Have they said this about you?

There are many misconceptions abortion supporters have about people who are pro-life. We’re all men. We’re all mean. And so on.

But there’s a more subtle misunderstanding we’ve picked up on as we continue to talk with people who disagree with us. Seemingly insignificant, this false view they have of what we say and do often leads them to misunderstand our overall case against abortion.

What is it? Watch the video below to see if you can catch it yourself. Then jump down to find out what it is and get some quick tips.

When you say, “Abortion is wrong,” what do you often hear in response? A long list of circumstances explaining how hard the mother’s life is. In the video above, the young girl who meets Created Equal team member Lisbeth references, for example, the emotional challenges of pregnancy, the difficulty of sorting through the question of adoption, etc.

The point she’s making, like many others, is that because life is hard, abortion is okay.

Why do so many abortion advocates feel compelled to respond to our argument by saying, essentially, “But life is hard”? It seems they misunderstand our basic case. When we say, “Abortion is wrong,” they seem to hear us saying it is easy for the mother to keep the child, place the child for adoption, etc. And so they respond by saying, “No, you’re wrong. It’s hard.”

But we’ve never said this. The case against abortion has never been based on the ease with which someone carries a baby, gives birth, makes parenting decisions, etc. Our case has always been that regardless of how hard it may be, doing the right thing remains the right thing.

Quick Conversation Tips: “But it’s hard.”

Acknowledge the Challenge: In the video, Lisbeth acknowledges the difficult circumstances women face: “Everything you’re bringing up is a tough circumstance,” she says. This is not to concede the case against abortion, but it makes the person with whom you’re talking feel heard.

Underscore the Common Ground: Lisbeth continues, “We’re not saying that pregnancy, childbirth, or raising a baby is easy.” Here Lisbeth makes it explicit that she and the young woman have clear common ground. This truth that they share—that people often face great challenges—sets the conversation up for where it needs to go.

Return to the Key Point: Then after acknowledging how difficult life may be, Lisbeth then asks, “But is it ever okay to intentionally kill innocent human beings?” She quickly walked the young woman through her objection—acknowledging that which is true, underscoring that they share these truths in common, and then bringing it back to the important point of disagreement.